dia yang selalu datang belakangan

he is a year older than me, he is an engineer, he is a moslem, he is a Javanese (yes sometimes it matters) and i like this kind of guy tho, and he graduated early. we meet like a year ago. we start going out the beginning of this year, and it went pretty well. lets call we do a movie date, we have a lunch or dinner sometimes, rarely text messages, it is between he knows how to keep me around or it is just the way he is :) thought of those things, i surely have no reason not to be with him. at that time, it just don't work out with me, while deep down in my heart i want it going as the way two people who had a so called pedekate expect. so yeah, here i am. now i know why people always say "kenapa sih penyesalan selalu dateng belakangan?'" funny. the last time we communicate were in may, see? funny, isn't it? why it took such a long time for me to realize that i want that person, i need that kind of relationship, i spoiled it with no reason left for him. man! this is December, i took too much time just for realize that i missed him. and yesterday i went like crazy stalker, i try to found him in almost social media, and it turns out zero. found another good thing bout him, he is not doin a social media 'thing' :) well haha that's called penyesalan tho. i cant even reach him when i still hope that we can meet somewhere, sometimes. geez! another chance pleaseeeeeee